Hello! Who holds the reins in your place?
Discover your inner driving forces!
Have you ever felt like you were on autopilot in certain situations, especially when you were stressed? That inner voice whispering, “It’s not perfect enough,” “Hurry up,” or “You have to figure this out on your own”?
Psychologists call these internal drives. These invisible engines provide our energy, but if we're not paying attention, they often set the pace—causing unnecessary stress and exhaustion.
Experienced professional
I am a psychopedagogue and social worker by training. I have decades of experience helping families and individuals with conflict management and self-knowledge.
My goal is for my clients to find inner balance and improve their relationships, whether it's raising children or dealing with challenges at work.
The 5 main drivers
Although all five are present in all of us, one or two usually dominate, especially in stressful situations.
Be perfect!
How it works: A strong internal drive to perform flawlessly. The person feels they will only be accepted if they perform 100% of everything.
Advantage: Thorough, precise, high quality requirements.
Disadvantage: Gets lost in details, has difficulty delegating, is afraid of making mistakes, and often misses deadlines due to excessive control.
Be strong!
How it works : Strives for the appearance of invulnerability. Believes that showing emotions is weakness and that he must solve everything on his own.
Advantage : Calm, resilient, reliable and independent in a crisis situation.
Disadvantage : He becomes isolated, does not ask for help even when the waves crash over his head, and may seem emotionally unapproachable.
Hurry!
How it works : He lives under constant time pressure and believes his value is in his speed. He rushes even when there is no reason to.
Advantage : It reacts quickly, gets a lot done in a short time, and is fast.
Disadvantages : Impatient with others, makes superficial mistakes due to haste, and is incapable of truly relaxing.
Make an effort!
How it works : For him, it's not the result that matters, but the "blood and sweat" invested. He feels that only hard-won things have value.
Advantages : Persistent, enthusiastic when starting out, looking for challenges.
Disadvantage : Tends to overdo things, overcomplicates even simple tasks, and often starts things but doesn't finish them (because the goal is the process, not success).
Get joy!
How it works : Driven by a need to conform. Harmony and the well-being of others are more important to them than their own interests or the efficiency of the task.
Advantages : Empathetic, team player, good diplomat.
Disadvantage : Inability to say no, avoids necessary conflicts, and is uncertain when making decisions because they want to please everyone.
It is important to emphasize that neither driving force is “bad” in itself, but if they unconsciously control our lives, it can lead to burnout and relationship difficulties. The path to development is awareness and the incorporation of “permissions” (e.g., “I am free to make mistakes,” “I am free to ask for help”).
What do you think is your main drive? – Write it down for yourself! Are you curious to know if you “guessed correctly”? – Then we have a very thorough test for you consisting of 50 questions.
Why should you take this 50-question test? And why should you ask your partner or family to do it too?
This series of questions is not a quick "magazine test". It is a precise tool that helps you map your individual driving forces, which provides important insights for your self-knowledge work. The answers show:
What are the internal commands that guide your decisions?
Where are your own "stress traps" where you tend to overexert yourself?
How to regain control over your own reactions using the "permissions" technique.
In the case of your partner (or your child over 15-16), you can gain a common understanding of each other. You can understand why you can sometimes get along amazingly well together, and why you argue over seemingly trivial things at other times. When you know each other's drives, blame is replaced by understanding and support.
Before you start...
In order for the test to be a true reflection of you, please create the necessary conditions for answering:
Listen inwardly : Find a quiet corner where no one will disturb you. Answer the questions at once, do not leave the process half-way!
Take 10-15 minutes : Don't rush (even if the "Hurry!" driving force is already making you impatient!), but don't overthink your answers either.
Be honest with yourself : There are no “right” or “wrong” answers here. The only correct answer is the one that reflects your current functioning.
Listen to your first instinct : Don't overanalyze the questions; your first, instinctive reaction is usually the most accurate.
Are you ready? Here are the questions:
Rate the following statements on a scale of 1-5 according to how you see yourself in your environment right now.